Summer 1987

Earlier I was sorting through some ancient videos (circa 1987 - VHS of Pretty Woman for example) & DVD's in an attempt to control clutter and lighten the total pounds of our household goods. Yes, I know exactly how much everything in our house weighs . . . 12,000 pounds, plus we have 3,000 in storage in Texas. 2000 of it is Man's refusal to part with his past -- I can think of at least 20 t-shirts, also circa 1987, in a size way too small medium that are in box in San Antonio. Their combined weight conspiring against what furniture I can buy here in Belgium.

But, I digress. Summer of 1987 has absolutely nothing to do with Man, at all. Instead it has everything to do with Tammy & I -- and countless other confused and lovesick 15 year old girls like us.

You see, while I was sorting through DVD's I came across a blue spiral notebook filled from front to back with poems and lovesick ramblings. At first, I thought it was filled with my handwriting, but upon closer inspection, it's decidedly Tammy's. She filled the notebook as a gift for me. I'm thinking this was probably her main source entertainment as she spent much of her freshman year (86-87) grounded for not following one of her parents' Haus Rules. It was the one about not hosting wild keg parties with boys in attendance while the parents are out of town. Gosh, from the way T-Mac (her dad) reacted, you would have thought she broke a major rule or something.

Anyway, the front cover of this sprial has a note to me written in hot pink paint pen:

Michelle, Hi Babie! I coped all of these that I have for you. Enjoy! I know you will. Love always, Tammy Lynn :)

The first page:

July 15, 1987

Michelle, I love Scotty Lee Kelley! Remember that Always! Big, fat, poofy heart, Tam

Did you notice the date? It was 21 years ago TODAY - how apropos that I should find it on its anniversary. Also, we won't think too much about the kids born on that day -- they are officially old enough to legally drink!

Anyway, I'd like to share with you the contents of this spiral. Most of the entries are written by unknown authors & many of the poems will be familiar to those of you who were teens in the '80. Poems like:

Loving Him

When I met him, I liked him
When I liked him, I loved him
When I loved him, I let him
When I let him I lost him.

And,

All Because

I climbed up the door and shut the stairs
I said my shoes and took off my prayers
I turned out my bed and climbed into the lights
All because he kissed me goodnight.

And,

Boyfriends

A boyfriend is a conceited jerk
He thinks he's really grand
He's high opinioned of himself
It's more than I can stand
He thinks he's all my dreams come true
that he's my guiding light
And, what's worst of all -- he's right

And,

A Prayer for My Boyfriend (I'll transcribe this exactly! Strikethrough & all - what's that about?)

Heavenly Father, full of grace
Bless my boyfriends foxy face
Bless his hair that tends to curl
Keep him away from other guys girls
Bless his eyes that tend to roam
Keep him from seeing what's not shown
Bless this guy I love to miss
Bless this guy I love to kiss
Bless this guy I long to marry
Bless his children I'd love to carry
Bless his body that feels so right
Bless his arms that hold me tight
Bless his hands so big & strong
But, keep them, Lord, where they belong
Bless this guy I love to clench
Bless his tongue that loves to French
And, if he should read this prayer of mine,
Bless the thoughts that cross his mind.

Other Titles include:

Forget, GoodBye, Child Abuse, The Class Ring, You Think, I Died of Love, God Above, I Will Always Love You, For You, Faraway Thoughts, Love is not for Boys, Broken Dreams, Breaking Up, Pretenders, A Love to Call My Own, The Corner of My Mind, I Had You Once, The Crumpled Letter, I Still Love You, A New Start, She & I, I Am Not There, Friends, Protected Love, Hold Onto Your Dreams, Faithfully and You Fulfill My Dreams.

Yeah, I know, could you imagine any of these being blog titles for HausFrau? Well, now that I take a close look, I might be able to salvage: Forget, GoodBye, A New Start & Friends. Hey, now that I think about it, it's almost my life's motto: never Forget your Friends as you say GoodBye and make a New Start. LMAO, I'm just once step closer to reconnecting with my inner 15-year-old.

Now for the real treat, I'll share with you musing from a 15-year-old me. This one has survived 21 years without a title.

I will now dub it Gag Me With A Spoon

In the distance, so far away
Drawing closer everyday

Now in my reach, now in my sight
Almost mine, but not quite

Moving away to a faraway place
the only memory is of the face

Someday soon coming back
now it's mine, nothing to lack

Or, even better this one. Also Untitled until now -- I'll call it Like, Oh, My Gawd!

Tossed on life's merciless waves
Washed out to sea, but not forgotten
- my dreams

Floating helplessly through the lonely tides
but not forgotten
- my dreams

Wanting desperately to soar away
on eagles' wings
- my dreams

Someday - yes, I'll soar through clouds
and over mountains with the wind beneath
- my dreams

How about this one? The original title of Protected Love is now being changed to Put Your Big Girl Panties on and Get Some Self-Esteem

So many times I've left myself wide open
For you to play with my emotions
Just this once I'd like to know
If you really love me so
You can't decide if you like me or not
But I love you so and care for you a lot
Before you ask me another thing
Be sure you love me more than anything
I love you so much, it's easy to see
But do you really truly love me?

And my personal favorite. I vaguely remember calling a local radio station (yes, KNIN for those of you wondering) and reading this on-air. Maybe? Anyway, here's my best teen attempt to cram as many '80's love songs into one DumbAss Essay.

Together Again

Somehow all the thrown words and Careless Whispers finally got around. I really thought we had Endless Love, but maybe I was wrong. you wouldn't listen to me when I begged for that One More Night. Just Once I would like to look Through The Eyes Of Love and see Just You & I. I really tried to get over you, but You're a Hard Habit to Break. So, I tried to think of us living Seperate Lives, but couldn't. My Burning Heart got the best of me. Suddenly, I changed, and you should Take a Look at Me Now. Finally, I come to you with Broken Wings and hope you'll take me back with Open Arms. I have been Saving All My Love For You and We've Got Tonight. Now I look into your eyes and see Heaven, realizing the Search is Over. After All That We've Been Through, I've stayed Faithfully yours. Tonight I Celebrate My Love For You and pray it will last longer than any before. Being in your arms I know Nobody Loves Me Like You Do. For what seemed an eternity I prayed that If Ever You're in My Arms Again I would never let you go. Against All Odds, we are together again and I know I will Cherish the love forever.

Perhaps I should copyright this one & sell it online as part of a 1980's Retro Wedding Package - Love Song Wedding Vows plus a CD with all the songs to play at the reception. I could sell it for $19.87.

Seriously, I think I'll let Laze-E and her friends browse my secret stash of retro love poems. I have a feeling they will be well received & that MySpace is about to experience a whole new level of desperation & lovesickness. Finally, someone put into words exactly what they are all thinking and feeling. For the record, we are hosting a day-time sleepover right now and there's 80's music blaring on Laze-E's stereo . . . ooooh, Heaven is a place on Earth . . .

TTFN. I'm off to sort through our CD collection. No, not to lighten the HHG's load, silly. I'm checking to see how many 80's love songs we own.